Enjoy the following blog posts and I hope it inspires you.
October 23, 2007
Wild Spirit Wolf Sanctuary 1
So right now I am in New Mexico listening to all 62 wolves howl in unison. An amazing experience I can never explain.
I decided to volunteer for two months at Wild Spirit Wolf Sanctuary. I've always felt attracted to wolves and have always wanted to visit the southwest so here I am. I just finished up my first week here and it has been nothing short of amazing and inspiring.
So my day begins at 8a.m. when I go to give the wolves that are older or sick their medicine. We wrap their vitamins or pills in hamburger meat and call them medicine balls. after that is done we clean our animals' enclosure which is quite big and make sure they have clean water to drink. Once everyone is done with that it is FEEDING TIME. Feeding time consists of throwing a large raw meat loaf that we freeze over an enclosure to each animal. THere are two animals to each enclosure, usually a male and female. It is so crazy to see the wolves eat a four pound rock solid block of frozen meat in a matter of minutes.
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| Wolves have very powerful jaws which helps them in the wild to hunt. This is why we usually throw their food over the enclosure. People have had fingers bit off because the wolves thought they were food. |
The second part of my day is is spent in the wolf kitchen either sorting through donated meat from butchers and hunters to make sure there aren't any bones, bullets, or arrowheads in any of the donations.
The sorted meat gets put into a loaf and then frozen. Another meal we prepare for the wolves is kind of like a meat loaf. It's hamburger meat mixed with vegetables and oats and barley. This is to mimic the wolves diet in the wild when they would eat the stomach contents of their prey (elk, deer, moose, all vegetarians). It's funny--me the vegetarian--now preparing all this raw meat. :) It really doesn't gross me out though.
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| mmm - delicious! |
The rest of the day is usually spent doing different projects around the sanctuary whether it's researching the proper diet for an ill animal (right now i'm researching for animals with liver problems), or filling in holes that were dug by the older animals but need to be filled because they keep falling in them, or tomorrow I am going to be in the enclosure with real wolves cleaning out their little pond because they are cold weather animals and they like to get wet to cool off (even though it's only 50 degrees here during the day).
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| Me, Christian (the other Mexican), Jason and Sarah (both Brits) |
October 24, 2007
R.I.P. Churchill (graphic)
Today Christina and I were cleaning out the enclosures of two young wolves, Savannah and Storm. Churchill is a volunteer's kitten that was wondering around teasing the wolves as he always does. One minute I'm petting Storm and then next minute he and Savannah have got Churchill in their mouths and are pulling him in both directions. Christina and I froze...we didn't know what to do-my stomach was nauseated, but they are wolves. This is what wolves do. It was so scary so we ran out of the enclosure--we knew the kitten was probably already dead as wolves usually go for the neck first and Christina and I told Jason, the volunteer whose cat it was and he ran up to the enclosure and kicked the fence and cursed out the wolves and then Christina distracted Savannah with raw chicken and was able to get the shredded remains of the cat in a bucket to give to Jason. We all went with him to try to bury it but the ground here is so hard...we weren't able to. I think he may cremate it...I'm not sure.
It was so incredibly grotesque to watch and crazy but just another lesson from nature. I feel so bad for Jason but we told him a million times in the short time that i've been here to keep his kittens in his hogan but he thought it cruel. Most of the other cats here don't go up to the enclosures and tease the wolves like those kittens. I feel so horrible because he's so sad about it though...
This also exemplifies how quick wolves are and how curious kittens that keep teasing them and have no respect for them get treated, The other cats here have learned how to respect the wolf--which is how they've stayed alive.
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| T.C. lived a long time at the sanctuary because he knew to never get too close... |
a traumatic day....
October 31, 2007
HOWLOweeeen!
This past Saturday we had our Halloween celebration here at the sanctuary. It was a fundraiser event with over 100 people invited. We had tables for sponsors from different wild life organizations, face painting, a "meet the wolf", and I was reading people's tarot cards. Angel was Little Red Riding Hood and I was a gypsy. There was pumpkin carving and stuffing and demonstration on how we make our loaf as well as food, campfire, hot chocolate and big bad wolf stories.
At around 6p.m. we took the people for a tour to see the wolves devour the pumpkins that were stuffed with meaty goodies. It was a real treat for people to see the wolves tear to shreds their pumpkins searching for treats. The next day wasn't so good for the wolves OR US since we clean out their enclosures and they ate food they're not usually accustomed to. After people saw the wolves ravish their pumkins they were taken on a night tour in which we all acted out and read parts. I read about wolf myths among the Navajo and the idea of skinwalkers. The Navajo believe wolves to be evil because Navajo witches are commonly viewed as "skinwalkers" or man dawning wolves' clothing. There was also talk about the various mythology concerning wolves. This included Pawnee creation myth, constellations named after the Latin name for wolf, Greek mythology, etc.
When the night tour concluded we all went to the big campfire and shared more wolf stories and then said goodbye to some wolves that the sanctuary saw pass this past year. This included tossing some of their cremated remains into the fire and telling stories about their lives.
Some other things are going on here now as well. Yesterday I had two women come by to see me because they had heard about my amazing ability with the tarot. Apparently, someone that was here for the Halloween festivities told them that I was really good. I find this pretty funny considering I just started learning tarot and have been practicing for two weeks PLUS I still am using my book for reference each time. It's pretty cool though, and they were happy enough with me to leave me a really nice tip...perhaps I'll start my own tarot service in Chicago...haha. (just kidding mom!)
Another huge thing that happened is that I'm finally past training and have gotten my own animals to take care of! I am now the caretaker of the following:
Sequoia: a lower content wolf dog and very sweet older lady.
Oscar and Gaia: Oscar is huge! I think he weighs about 120lbs. He's a mid content wolf dog that's very very sweet but HUGE. Gaia is a dog that was raised by wolves and so she thinks she is a wolf and enjoys catching ravens--I picked out the remains of one out of her enclosure this morning.
Dusty and Spector: Mid-content wolf dogs that are extremely shy. They have not come up to me yet and have only gone as far as to sniff my bucket while I was on the other side of the enclosure. Generally wolves in the wild are incredibly timid toward humans because we are their only predator. My goal for the time I'm here is to be able to pet one of them and get them to come closer to me so I've been spitting in their enclosure so that they know my scent and trying to talk to them a bit.
Duchess and Geronimo: WOLVES! These guys are actually one of the highest maintenance anmals here. They are beautiful Artic wolves and I am forbidden to touch them unless I have a death wish. In order to get into their enclosure I need a red key which is used for only the most dangerous of our animals and so being here for two weeks I get one! This is not usually the case, however, and people that have been here for a year don't even have this key. The reason I am able to take care of their feeding and their enclosure is because they get no socialization and they have a subenclosure. When I feed them I put their meat in their subenclosure, use a drawstring to open it and they go in there and eat while I lock them up and clean their enclosure and I let them back in when I'm done and everything is completely locked up.
I'm so happy to finally be taking care of my own animals. At first, there is a training period that lasts about 10 days but two weeks in my case because of the Halloween Party, and we have every Monday off. During this period you learn about all the animals and how to enter an enclosure, proper cleaning and caring methods, proper interaction methods, etc. This is extremely important because one wrong move i.e. bending over your wolf dog or wolf in a dominant way can get you a nice bite. These are not typical dogs and have a complex communication system as well as social order. Gaia for instance, is a dog, but since she was raised by wolves, she will growl at you if you rub her belly. She enjoys it, but since she's confused, her growling is letting you know that while she's in a very submissive position, that she is still in charge and asserting her dominance by growling.
Today was also my first tour here at the sanctuary. It's nice because I will get to meet new people that come in as well as make more tips. (because I am totally here for the money) :)
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| Oscar and Gaia howling |
December 1, 2007
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| Storm howling |
Dear Everyone,
It's been a while since I've written. I apologize but things have been pretty crazy here at the sanctuary. I came here because I thought the days would be longer and I'd have more time to think but time remains the same: whizzing by day after day without a moment's rest.
So the British invasion has started. Christian has left and there are three new people here to volunteer from England. Sonny, Tasha and Claire have recently joined us here in Candy Kitchen. I get along really well with Sonny and Claire and getting to know Tasha a bit more. Sonny plays guitar and so we've been bonding a lot through music and Claire is a bit older with a fantastic sense of humor.
They had their first Thanksgiving here with us. Christina and I did most of the cooking--there was turkey and I made homemade enchiladas plus cornbread and stuffing and sweet potatoes etc. Everyone put on makeup (except for Sonny seeing as he's the only male around here out of the volunteers) and we went around the table saying what we were thankful for. I still really missed my family, being home and all the delicious Mexican delights they cook up. It was a very nostalgic day for me, despite being surrounded by people.
I have new animals since we have more people. Now I am taking care of Savannah and Storm (things are coming full circle since they are the ones that ate that kitten). They are pure wolves and I am their first caretaker that hasn't actually hand raised them. It is quite the honor to take care of them but they are very mischievous. I was playing with them and petting them and Savannah stole a glove out of my pocket (I don't usually wear them when I'm in with the wolves because they will bite at my fingers). To get my glove back I had to offer her a trade so I pulled out my other glove to tease her with and she dropped the glove she was chewing and came near me. It was at that moment that Storm stole the glove I was teasing Savannah with out of my hand and then I had to grab the chewed up glove and tease Storm with it and this lasted for about ten minutes until I finally escaped with both gloves and a missing thumb on one of them. :)
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| Mmm Enchiladas, cornbread, Americans on one side and the Brits on the other... |
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| Sweet Savannah and half of my face. :) |
Apparently all of my animals like to eat kittens. I was in the outhouse right by Duchess and Geronimo's enclosure one night (these are the other wolves I take care of that I'm not allowed to touch because of their unpredictable behavior) and I heard a squeal and so I shone my flashlight on them and saw they were fighting over a cat. I went to Sonny's trailer and woke him up and we watched them try to dominate one another for the kitten. Duchess finally won and then next day I found half of the kitten's body buried in their enclosure. I've also seen the cats here (the ones that survive and have learned to respect the wolf) eat a bird. Quite a good view of the circle of life around these parts. The cat that Duchess and Geronimo ate was not a sanctuary cat. Apparently people around here think of us as the "animal people" and as such believe it to be a good idea to leave their kittens around here thinking we will take care of them when in reality they end up getting eaten by wolves.
I've also been getting bitten more. Not because the animals are feeling aggressive but because they are more comfortable with me and will play a little rougher. Nothing major: just a few scratched and bites here and there.
My friend Sal came to visit me this past weekend. It was fun because he had a car and we were able to leave the sanctuary for a bit. We went to Gallup and I bought myself a beautiful turquoise necklace and some earrings and we just hung out. It was nice to be in a car and to actually be able to see people. Yesterday we went hiking up El Morro National Monument. It was absolutely breathtaking (both literally and metaphorically). We climbed up 200 feet and saw petroglyphs from the Anasazi.
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| Me, Sonny and Sal |
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| Sal taking photographs Sonny and I last week went on a hike out of the sanctuary for six hours. We must have walked about ten miles nonstop. It was really beautiful and calming. We found the most amazing rock formation and literally sat there for half an hour in complete silence. It was truly a spiritual meditative moment. |
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| That gorgeous spot we found... I've been dog sitting for Angel--I've had her Saint Bernard sleep with me in my new hogan for the past week. Savannah is her name. Savannah snores and didn't let Sal sleep much when he was here. :) Other than that she's drooly but sweet. |
Ah yes, my new hogan: I have a wood burning stove. It's very rewarding to cut my own wood and create my own warmth. I also have a computer in there for music and movies (no Internet) so that's been really nice, plus a couch and a bigger bed. I have a lot more space than I did in the trailer. It's become the hangout place for everyone here. I enjoy the company too.
If you're wondering why I haven't written many updates it is because the Brits are usually on the computer. :)
The weather is getting colder here. As soon as the sun goes down it's freezing, but pretty tolerabe in the sunlight. It does make getting out of bed quite difficult though. As my time here draws to a close (I leave the 18th) I've had some time to reflect on a few things. I didn't come here for the usual reasons like wanting to volunteer and help some people out. I came here because I felt drawn to this place. I felt drawn to working with wolves and when I heard about the opportunity I immediately jumped on it. I feel very thankful for being able to have such an amazing opportunity to work with one of the world's most beautiful creatures. I've learned more here in two months than I have in a year of normal life in Chicago. There's something about working, socializing, and just being with the same people day after day... I've learned a lot about myself and how I take on roles, how others respond to me, even the subtle ways in which I dominate or submit to situations (working with wolves' communication styles has so much to do with respecting dominance with submissiveness). I've learned how to approach some people by working with the animals--this means respecting their space when they don't feel like coming up to you or being patient and calm until they decide it's safe to come close. Many of the same rules apply to human relationships. I've learned positive things about myself like how I take on difficult jobs and do them to the best of my ability, how I'm very adaptable to situations--even living very primitively sharing one working shower and bathroom with 8 other people, or how I work really hard and try to be a team player as best as possible. But I've also realized some things I need to work on within myself.
I've actually been pinned here as the token Mexican cook because I cook so much and I'm Mexican. I think this has to do with the fact that everyone else is just really English...but I don't really mind so much. I make fun of them in spanish anyway--just kidding. It truly is a nice cultural exchange. I've been drinking more tea here than I'd like to admit.
I think working outside in a hands on environment has been really good for me. It's one thing to read about wolves and a completely other thing to interact with them. You see their displays, you see them interacting in a pack, you see who the food aggressor is etc. I recommend this experience to anyone that would be interested.
Well I'm off to wash up before dinner!
December 11, 2007
What we do about these jumpin wolves....
Today was quite exciting but this week has been pretty exciting as well as a bit melancholic. By this time next week I will likely be sitting at my parents' kitchen table drinking tea (damn those english and their influence) while chatting and showing pictures.
Anyway, today one of the wolves I used to take care of, Dusty, decided to jump the fence to another enclosure and then proceed to dominate and tackle another older female wolf. Both wolves were older females really but Dusty is quite the jumper. Anyway, Tasha was screaming on the radio and so we all dropped what we were doing and ran up the snowy hill with nets and a kennel and other capture equipment. It was really hectic. Dusty is a very skittish girl and I was never able to even get within ten feet of her the entire time I took care of her. Leyton, the director, finally arrived and then Dusty decided to jump into another enclosure. Even worse. She jumped in with Zeus who has apparently bitten off a child's finger and killed other canines in the past (by the way I take care of him) so we thought for sure some crazy shit was going to go down but Zeus seemed too startled by all the people yelling to do anything and so she jumped back to Waya and Lakota's enclosure and we ran over and then she finally decided to jump back into her enclosure. No nets needed.
In other news about the animals, Savannah, Angel's dog that I watched for a week--cutest St. Bernard ever, is ill and doesn't have much longer to live. This was found out after she collapsed and Angel drove to Albuquerque ( a three hour drive) to see the vet first thing and they found all sorts of tumors all over her. Angel is really sad since Savannah isn't really that old and she's such a good dog. Worse, this all happened the evening after we had found Nimoy who was in Powder Pack barely able to walk because the rest of the pack had ganged up on him and done some serious damage. Angel had just gotten back from Albuquerque and the vet only to go back again.
Which brings me to Nimoy. Nimoy is a wolf that was put into a pack a little late in his life at nine months. He was the Omega in the pack and we thought that was all it was but they picked on him a bit too roughly and needless to say he will never go back into that enclosure with them again. So to backtrack a bit let me tell you what an Omega means:
Which brings me to Nimoy. Nimoy is a wolf that was put into a pack a little late in his life at nine months. He was the Omega in the pack and we thought that was all it was but they picked on him a bit too roughly and needless to say he will never go back into that enclosure with them again. So to backtrack a bit let me tell you what an Omega means:
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| They did some serious damage. |
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| Poor little guy.. |
In the wild a wolf pack will generally have an alpha male and an alpha female. These are the only wolves that breed. In a way, it's like
wolf birth control and ensures the survival of the species. The alphas are the leaders of the pack and in charge. Generally the alpha female has a bit more power since she generally decides where to put her den and where the pack moves. Second in command is the Beta wolf who will basically serve as the one who makes sure everything runs smoothly within the pack, be the primary babysitter etc.
Lower on the chain are the subordinates which is everyone else. The lowest on the chain is the Omega. The Omega serves a crucial role by deferring tension and acting as the class clown. For example, let's say the beta male and alpha male are fighting over fresh elk that was just caught, the omega will then do something really stupid like eat before it has been given permission to eat thus dissolving the tension among the greater ranks and as usual having everyone else pick on him or her. Wolves will never seriously injure the omega and he or she always has the option to leave the pack but seldom do for the security of the pack as well as the steady food supply. Now, the reason the wolves have this structure in the wild, the only other large mammals other than humans that have such structured social roles, is because it makes them amazing at what they need to do to survive which is hunt. If everyone knows their role they can be incredibly efficient. So as I said they would never seriously injure an omega...but they seriously injured Nimoy..so how does that work?
wolf birth control and ensures the survival of the species. The alphas are the leaders of the pack and in charge. Generally the alpha female has a bit more power since she generally decides where to put her den and where the pack moves. Second in command is the Beta wolf who will basically serve as the one who makes sure everything runs smoothly within the pack, be the primary babysitter etc.
Lower on the chain are the subordinates which is everyone else. The lowest on the chain is the Omega. The Omega serves a crucial role by deferring tension and acting as the class clown. For example, let's say the beta male and alpha male are fighting over fresh elk that was just caught, the omega will then do something really stupid like eat before it has been given permission to eat thus dissolving the tension among the greater ranks and as usual having everyone else pick on him or her. Wolves will never seriously injure the omega and he or she always has the option to leave the pack but seldom do for the security of the pack as well as the steady food supply. Now, the reason the wolves have this structure in the wild, the only other large mammals other than humans that have such structured social roles, is because it makes them amazing at what they need to do to survive which is hunt. If everyone knows their role they can be incredibly efficient. So as I said they would never seriously injure an omega...but they seriously injured Nimoy..so how does that work?
Well, Nimoy was not related to any of them and put into the pack at nine months old when the rest of the pack had been together since they were two months old. Also in the wild, the only non related members of the pack are the Alpha male and Alpha female. There is no imbreeding in wolves thus no hip dysplasia or other genetic diseases associated with large canines. What normally happens in a pack is when they reach the age of 2 - 3 years (the age in which they mature) they decide on what role they want to play. So alpha male and female have pups and they all fall into beta or subordinate roles and then they have more pups and everyone in the pack takes care of them (yeah wolves LOVE babies and pregnant women by the way) including teaching them to hunt and playing with them and even "babysitting." So let's say one pup gets older and decides that she should be Alpha. Well, there can only be one Alpha female so what will happen is she challenges mom and mom usually wins and that is when you will get a lone wolf howling for their mate and if all goes well she finds a nice alpha male solitary and mates and then has her own pack.
So yeah--to make a long explanation short, Nimoy was never fully accepted into the pack.
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| Last moments with Geronimo |
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| I still think of him...he past a few months ago. I miss him. |
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| The view from right outside of my hogan door. |
Geronimo caught a raven the other day. I plucked it and have been having meetings with this old man here who has been showing me to make things with the feathers using beads and leather. He's been teaching me more than that though just about life and what not. I picked fresh sage at his house last week in the snow.
January 28, 2008
About those wolves..
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| Claire looking at my so sad on my last day... |
I left the sanctuary December 18, 2007. I was a bittersweet moment as I walked past the enclosures and Raven was waiting for me and howled his morning greeting. Storm came up to the fence wanting a few pets from me and of course Geronimo the day before could feel something was up--he was extra affectionate and let me pet him (absolutely forbidden by the way) for twenty minutes. I walked to the volunteer kitchen for some coffee and then somehow got tricked into taking care of Nimoy in the animal care office my last moments at the sanctuary (Nimoy had gotten beaten up by his pack in the last email if you remember and was still recovering...). I said my goodbyes and we drove to my hogan to pick up my things and I bid the sanctuary and the wolves goodbye...
On the plane I felt an ambivalence about going home. Back to the rush of the city and I knew how much work awaited me at home. I had to move back into my apartment, see everyone, hopefully find a job rather quickly as I didn't have much money to hold me over for much time, and of course get settled. No more would I see the vast landscape of mountainous terrain when I stepped out my door. It would be replaced by buildings everywhere and high rises so high they meet the horizon every sunset. No more would I breath the clean crisp air but rather exhuast fumes. No longer would I have that sweet solitude when it was just myself and the moon at night with the wolves howling. Another magic awaited me in Chicago. Home is after all, where the heart is, and my heart is here...
Luckily, Lady Luck was on my side when I got home. After a few weeks of overwhelming exhuastion unmatched in New Mexico (yes yes even with my days filled of sorting meat and carrying five gallon water buckets and walking three hours a day) I felt a different exhuastion here: an emotional one. From the quiet nights in New Mexico to the tequila ridden holiday parties with my loud and amazing family. I loved seeing everyone for the holidays and was so happy to spend time with my brother, whom I had missed like crazy as well as my cousins, Tony and David, who are like brothers to me. My parents had missed me much and I them and I revelled in being spoiled a bit by everyone like my dad and boyfriend who met me at the airport and carried my bags (a nice change..).
After the rush of the holidays it came time for me to find a job. I wasn't looking forward to sending off dozens of resumes and cover letters to people trying to sell myself, but it was a necessary evil as we all have bills to pay and I wouldn't be living for free and eating for free anymore so I took the counsel of my aunt and talked to this woman she knew that would be a great resource for me to talk to. I spoke with her on a Thursday and she called me knowing of an opportunity to work for a non-profit organization on a Friday. I emailed my resume and cover letter that Friday, interviewed Monday, and started that Wednesday.
So it has been quite non-stop since I've gotten home but I'm loving it.
I thank all of you that have reached out and contacted me since I've been back asking about my experience with the wolves and I'm so pleased that so many of you have taken an interest in these amazing animals. I think to fully realize all that I have learned at the sanctuary about myself as well as the animals and nature and duality will take me years to process. One thing I won't forget is that we are all animals and that we are all a part of nature. Nothing could exist without the Earth providing it to us. Yes we may be able to make synthetic fabrics but they are all modeled after nature. This desk I am sitting at is made from wood from a tree. The Earth is our home, but she is also home to many other species and out of respect for her and for other species we need to change. I have a shirt that says: humans are not the only species on Earth, we just act like it. There's also this song by Ani DiFranco (yes I love her) called Animal:
Looking out through my eyes
Seeing that animals only take from this world
What they need to survive
But she is prowling through all the religions of men
Seeing that time and time and time again
Their gods have made them
Special and above
Nature's law
And the respect thereof
I think that those are some words to meditate on. But I won't go further with that conversation. Suffice to say, that I also think that everyone should read the book Ishmael (thank you for loaning it to me in Wolfdom, Millie). It's very eye opening and a great story.
My best to all of you,
I wish you all much love and peace.
Thank you for reading!
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